Take this Job

27 February, 2004 4:25 p.m.

My boss gets this look on her face when she tells us our behavior is unacceptable. Her eyebrows knit up, and her jaw slackens, and her nostrils flare just a little. Everyone gets quiet as she shakes her index finger in front of her face, then stays quiet when she goes back in her office.

"Okay, hmm, guys," casual wording, but her lips tense and untense and there is a line across her forehead, "It is unacceptable to not know when the last day for pass/fail is."

February second.

We had a meeting to discuss exactly what we, as peer advisors should know, including the number of semesters you can fail all classes and stay in school and when registration can start and how quickly we should label envelopes. She called me into her office to tell me I don't label envelopes quickly enough.

What my job is, is to know every school policy regarding undeclared students, registration, leave of absences, withdrawls, probation, and scheduling. Also, labeling envelopes.

This is very important. We get paid six dollars an hour.

My boss has all these books on her bookshelf on keeping your Christian marriage healthy and happy. Once, during my job interview, she told me how she once never wanted kids. Sometimes she forgets to pick them up from school beause she stays late telling us we don't label envelopes fast enough. Or telling me, really.

Last week, I went to an interview in the school's writing center. The English professor who is in charge told me they pay twice what I'm making now. The books on his shelves? The Majick Bus, Fight Club, and Dharma Bums.

The full timers in my office, they're watching Oprah talk to rape victims about men waving their penises around, and they never label envelopes.

I want that job.

previous next

twice sixteen - 14 January, 2016
Hey--what's going on? - 11 April, 2008
I wasn't cool - 30 July, 2004
something you wouldn't believe if you saw it. - 11 May, 2004
Going to 17th and U - 27 April, 2004

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